https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fouqn5Xg5-E
If we are the body of Christ, why aren't we doing more? Why do we not listen to everyone because, if we truly love them, then we listen. We listen to what they say and we don't have to have the same view, but we can accept it and love them and explain why we think the way we do without having to resort to attacking the person's person. Resorting to insults. That isn't love anymore, that's just trying to hurt the person and not listening to them. We, as Christians, have to stop saying that we "ARE LISTENING" because most of the time, we aren't. We say that we are, we repeat that we are, but we're actually just thinking about what we're going to say back to prove that the other person is wrong. I read something today that basically, this person went to two different colleges. One of the colleges was "liberal" (I use that term VERY loosely) and the other was "conservative." The person said that the liberal school was more open to ideas and was willing to argue with the people than the conservative school. I am not saying that all Christians are conservatives, nor am I saying that all Christians should be liberal. But I'm trying to give you perspective on what we need to be more like and what we need to do: which is listen. God listens to us all the time - every incessant babble, every word that we think and pray to Him. Sometimes, someone doesn't need "healing," they need someone willing to listen and reaffirm what they're feeling and if they're looking for advice then give them advice - not someone telling them that what they're feeling is wrong.
I struggled with pornography for a long time - sometimes I still have the thoughts, but it wasn't until I said that it was okay to feel this way did I get anywhere. It wasn't until I reaffirmed myself that what I was feeling was real and it was natural, but that what I was doing with that natural feeling wasn't okay and wasn't natural did I start moving. If the people you're talking to are not looking for advice, but it's truly destructive then get them some help, but every situation is different. In Matthew 7:5, Jesus puts it like this: "You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye." To give a little context: This is the Sermon on the Mount where Jesus sits down and talks to the multitudes that were following him at this point and gives them a lot of information. It's Matthew 5-7 and I highly recommend reading it because it gives a lot of foundation for Christians. We're not Jesus, we strive to be like him, but we're not ever going to be perfect. We are imperfect and because of that, we have no room to judge, but we can help correct if we see someone that is struggling. Humans need to be held accountable, they need to be listened to and loved and helped, but if we don't try to correct people from a place of love and understanding, then why are we doing it? To prove that we're right? That usually just ends with people getting upset and then the other person not listening to what the person is trying to say - not seeing it from their perspective. The point you are trying to make doesn't matter if you don't listen to what the other person is saying.
Let me repeat that: THE POINT YOU ARE TRYING TO MAKE DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT THE OTHER PERSON IS SAYING.
Sorry, didn't mean to yell there, but you have to listen and validate what the other person is feeling - it may not be the facts that they are arguing with, but it's you or it's how they've been brought up, it's hard to get rid of something that you grew up with.
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