Systems

“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems." - James Clear

I've always been interested in habits, in what you can do in a day that will get you to where you're trying to go. I've always believed in the small moments, in the small things that compound over the big, flashy, one off event. I mean you don't become an Olympian because of the one day that you compete in the Olympics. You become an Olympian because you showed up everyday and worked everyday to become an athlete. You're an athlete first and then you train and train and train to rise to the next level. They don't show up on the day of the Olympics and say "oh I'll rise to the occasion like I always do, that's why I didn't put any work in." The work shows itself through the goal, not the goal showing itself in the system. Sometimes you can get stuck. You can get stuck in the system that you forget what the system was for in the first place. You can also lose sight of the goal that you were working towards. Something attainable is good to have, but once you have it, then what? Do you just not care anymore? A lot of times, no. The system has become part of your identity and instead of just working towards being an Olympian, you are now an athlete and you keep working out because it's what you've become used to. Because it's who you are now.

Systems are what make or break our dreams and sometimes our system isn't right for our dream. Lately, I've been getting rid of distractions so that I can focus on my system and what I want it to look like. I've been trying to hone in on what goals I want to achieve in my lifetime and what I'll need to do to get there. I've been failing at a lot of things because I've been so focused on the outcome that I've forgotten to put in the actual work to get the outcome. I failed a test today because I let myself get complacent and said my grade was good enough that I didn't need to study too hard for that test. So I goofed off and I suffered for it. My systems did not get me to my goals.

One big aspect of life is to adapt, to change your systems based on what you need in that present moment. I've taken a lot of time off and because of that, I'm not as good at school as I used to be. But I know more and as the semester is almost to a close, I feel like I'm too late in this semester to have too much of an impact on the outcome. My systems started off poorly and this semester has suffered because of that. However, my semester isn't going to end poorly. My systems will start to look towards my goals and maybe it won't be enough. One day it will be, but if that day isn't on the day of the final, then that's okay.

Failure is hard to get used to. It's hard being okay to fail, but I'm learning that it's the most important skill in life you can learn. Because failure means you're trying and it also gives you a chance. A chance to revise your systems that aren't working as intended and to make them better. Failure gives you a chance and helps you to see things from a different point of view. I'm still learning how to be okay not being the smartest in the room, letting myself be unsure about things and showing that unsurety to others.

Showing vulnerability has always been hard for me since I would lash out and get angry and that wasn't the most healthy, but I didn't know how I was feeling. No one explained to me what I was feeling so I kept trying to please everyone, not caring about my own mental health and I would lash out. I'd lash out and hurt the people closest to me. The system I had built in Elementary School did not work and, thus, could not stay for very long. In Middle School, I changed. Both from puberty, but also realizing that the identity I had built was me, but not to the truest extent. I was exhausting myself and I took time to figure out exactly what I was feeling. I'm thankful for that time, not because I had all the answers, but because I didn't and I was able to figure it out. I didn't have a goal back then, at least not a big one I was working towards, but I did have a system. It wasn't a very good system and didn't get me all the results I wanted - I got lazy and let myself become complacent, but it also allowed me to meet some of my best friends still to this day. Sometimes, your system isn't working, but you meet people that help you get it working.

I hope that whatever your goals are, that your system matches that and helps you get where you're trying to go. Good luck and have a fantastic day. Thanks for reading,

Alex Risdall :)